Roundabouts: not just for Britain anymore

A quick tutorial for my fellow Americans in the use of roundabouts:

For those who do not know, roundabouts are those places that look like four-way intersections in the road, but where a reassuring, familiar four-way stop would be there is instead a baffling circle.  Many of you regard these phenomena as terrifying, alien vortices of traffic-confluent death, and so they can become for the uninitiated.  Judging from what I have seen at the two roundabouts just down the block from my house, approximately nine in ten Americans view the mysterious "traffic circles" this way.  But it is not so difficult to navigate them as you might think.
First, the vehicles in the roundabout always have the right of way.  There are no exceptions to this.  If you are in the circle, do not yield to incoming cars, no matter how polite and deferential you feel like being.  Not only does this utterly defeat the streamlining intent of the roundabout, it is actually extremely lethal to those motorists behind you in the loop, who may be clipping along at a good 25 miles per hour, based on the assumption that there will not be a parked car before them.  Your act of Good Samaritanism may in fact endanger the lives of every driver in the traffic circle.  Way to go.
Second, if you are outside the roundabout waiting to get in, you must yield to the left.  That means that if you see a vehicle coming along from your left, you must make an assessment: is said vehicle far enough around the loop for you to enter without forcing said vehicle to brake in dramatic fashion?  If so, go for it.  If not, wait until the fucking car is past you.  Remember what I said about the motorists in the roundabout having the right of way?  Well, that applies to everyone, not just you, Paul Walker.  And trust me, your low-riding 2001 Honda Civic does not accelerate fast enough for such maneuvers just because you put a whale-tail spoiler on the trunk and racing stripe decals down the sides.
Third, roundabouts are one-way.  Period.  For fuck's sake.
For the nation that can proudly, drunkenly claim to have invented NASCAR, we sure seem to have difficulty grasping the basic concept of driving in a circle.  Let's not give those snooty, tea-sipping, crown-worshiping Brits another reason to besmirch us, friends.  Rise up, and responsibly use a roundabout!